wish i could look into a crystal ball and see my future..what my life will be like 8 yrs down the road. it has always been so predictable..and yet, now i know nth abt the future. nothing seems certain, and i hate feeling like this.

i can't talk to mum. talking to her drives me nuts; it makes me want to cry, to scream at her, to shake her out of her senses. why is it so difficult to be reasonable and think, to rationalise like an adult.why mum? i feel so frustrated. it's driving me up the wall. i'll be happy to stay on campus and not quarrel with her everyday, it's a win-win situation. but at the end of the day, i can't keep escaping like that can i? they're both so over protective, it's irksome.

i see in my parents what i do not want to be. through them, i know what kind of parent i should or shouldn't be. if i should ever treat my kids like that, may memories of all these heated arguments come back to me like a rude slap.